I'll Buy You Your Own Mausoleum Someday
by vindictive locomotive
Summary: "Normally, one would think that Butters would be the last person to go near a graveyard, but when your boyfriend is a habitual friend of death, you tend to stick around graveyards a lot." Bunny fluff. Just a cute little thing I dredged up from the bowels of my laptop.


Just something cute I began a while ago and decided it was high time I finished what I started. sigh. I've never written Bunny before so those of you who are seasoned experts, please tell me how I did. I like my South Park stories to be as accurate as possible, everything else can be as OOC and AU as it wants, but for some reason I feel like SP (the crackiest fandom when in true cannon form) should be done just right.

Right? I'm a weirdo.

Anyways, please enjoy and don't be afraid to criticize!

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I'll Buy You Your Own Mausoleum Someday

Butters sat on the sidewalk in front of Tom's Rhinoplasty, dismally toeing at a small piece of gravel that would have seemed insignificant to anyone but Butters. To Butters, nothing was insignificant; everyone deserved his full attention and there was always time for "hello" and "goodbye". Butters was just like that, that was always how he had seen the world and he would continue to forever see it that way. He never thought of it as anything different or out of the ordinary; but there were a few people, namely one person, who found it was beyond extraordinary.

He cursed as he overshot a gentle thrust of his foot and the stone went flying across the road instead of the mere few inches that he'd anticipated. There went his entertainment for the next fifteen minutes.

Butters sighed as he got up, brushing off his butt in a dual attempt to get some of the sidewalk debris off and also to try and get the blood flowing again, he _had_ been sitting there awhile, after all.

After making sure his butt was situated, Butters ambled down the walk in the direction of the graveyard. He had promised himself that he would wait a _little_ longer this time, but something else inside him just couldn't stand to wait another minute.

He let out an involuntary sigh of relief as the rows and rows of tombstones came into view. Edging sideways through the small gap in the rusty wrought iron gate, he made his way down a familiar route to one grave in particular.

Normally, one would think that Butters would be the last person to go near a graveyard, but when your boyfriend is a habitual friend of death, you tend to stick around graveyards a lot.

Not that it was Kenny's fault that he died almost twice a week. Butters figured that if even God had no explanation for his frequent reincarnations (according to Kenny, anyway) then it sure as hell wasn't Kenny's responsibility to know why life was such a bitch to him. No pun intended.

When Butters reached the only stone in the whole graveyard that didn't have a death date, he sat down and rubbed circles in his temples, wishing that he'd brought his sketchbook. He picked up a stick and was about to draw a lily in a small patch of dirt, when a voice broke through the silence.

"What, no flowers for my grave?"

Grinning, Butters turned around casually to find Kenny McCormick stretched out on his side on top of his gravestone, wearing a lecherous grin on his face, like always.

"Gosh, Kenny, I was gonna bring you flowers, but I found this stick on the ground and though it would go better with your personality."

Kenny grinned, "Well aren't you just the sweetest boyfriend ever?"

Butters kept smiling, but Kenny did not fail to notice the slight falter in his voice as he said: "Y-yeah, you bet your ass I am."

Kenny frowned and hopped off the tombstone. "What's up Butterfly?"

Butters' nervous exterior deepened tenfold, confirming Kenny's suspicions.

"W-what are you talking about, Kenny? I-I'm just f-fine." He stammered. Butters hardly ever stammered anymore, except when something huge was on his mind.

"Bull-shit, kiddo. Spit it out." Kenny deadpanned, and then added with a softer, more hurt, tone, "You can tell me."

Butters nodded as he kept his eyes fixed in the curved line in the dirt that had been the beginnings of his lily. Kenny wasn't having it though, he tipped Butters' chin up with the side if his index finger, forcing him to look him in the eye.

"Butters…" He said his name in that stern tone, and Butters found that he couldn't keep it in any longer; never could he refuse that parental tone that Kenny took on when Butters wouldn't tell him something.

Just like that, Butters suddenly seemed to break. He collapsed in to Kenny's chest, forcing him to shift his weight, lest he and Butters tumble to the ground.

"Its sucks Kenny, completely and utterly _sucks_. _They_ suck, I can't take it! This whole _town_ sucks because we _literally_ suck. God, why can't people learn to mind their own damn business and let other people be their own goddamn selves?" he buried his face into Kenny's left shoulder and sobbed. Kenny swore he could feel his heart breaking at the sight. He stroked Butters' hair gently and spoke soothingly to him.

"What happened, Butterfly? Who should I go beat up?" Kenny punctuated his concern with a soft but meaningful kiss to the top of Butters' head. Butters kept shaking.

"I-it's just this w-whole goddamn redneck town. Y-you'd think by now they m-might be used to it, but n-no, they h-have to be jerks about ev-everything." On the last syllable, Butters collapsed further into Kenny's chest, shaking violently with a fresh wave of tears.

"Well of course they do, Butterfly. They're from South Park, that's all they know how to do, not that they should be let off the hook for it, but it shouldn't be a surprise, babe." Kenny's tone was a soft fleece blanket; it wrapped around Butters' frail and shivering body and cocooned him in its security.

Butters only shook his head into Kenny's shoulder. "I'm not surprised, I'm j-just at the end of my limit."

Kenny shifted Butters in his arms and began drawing circles on his back. "Oh, baby—

Butters cut him off with another violent shake.

"K-kenny they wanna send me to N-new Grace again." His voice was barely above a whisper, but Kenny felt himself stiffen at the name.

"Who, your retarded parents?" He asked, more than a little ticked off. Really, couldn't they just leave their son alone and let him grow into himself for a change?

Butters sniffled loudly and nodded. Kenny's grip on Butters tightened ever-so-slightly.

"And what the fuck is that supposed to do? 'Pray the gay away'? This is who you are and you can't change that, and I wouldn't change you for the world."

Butters unglued himself from Kenny's chest and looked up at him with a defeated smile. It was a smile Kenny hated to see and yet did so too often.

"It's no use, Kenny. They don't get it and they never will. The best I can hope for is that I don't turn out like them."

"I'll never let that happen, Butterfly. You can count on it. As long as I'm around, none of their epic bullshit is gonna land on you." Kenny reassured his boyfriend, feeling the sincerity in every word.

Butters stiffened and pulled away slightly, eyes red with tears.

"That's just it, Kenny. You're not always around. Heck, nine days out of ten you're either off screwing around with Cartman or in the process of reincarnation." Looking into Butters' eyes, Kenny could only see helplessness and loneliness that just about tore him apart with guilt.

Shortly after this little outburst, Butters seemed to have realized what he'd said and immediately went into apology mode.

"I'm sorry, Kenny you didn't deserve that. It's not your fault you have to deal with that, and you have the right to hang out with your friends. I'm sorry I was—

"Totally justified." Kenny cut in sharply, "You're right Butters, how can I pay much attention to you when I'm always with Cartman or dead, usually because of Cartman. It's not fair to you, especially when you're going through something like this." He sighed and leaned his forehead against Butters' own. How could he be so stupid?

They stayed like that for a while longer while Butters pulled himself together. After he stopped crying Butters decided to ask the lingering question.

"So what are we gonna do? I've thought about every possibility and the only one that seems like it would work is running away together."

Kenny put his hand up immediately, "Butters, no one is running anywhere. You and I are gonna stay right here and face the music."

"But—" Butters started to protest, but Kenny held a finger to his lips.

"Now that doesn't mean you're going to New Grace either, we're going to make your parents deal with it once and for all."

Butters admired his boyfriend's determination, "But, what if they still don't accept me?"

Kenny smiled sweetly and hoisted Butters up so his legs were wrapped around his waist, "Well, then, I guess you'll just have to stay with me, won'tcha?"

Butters giggled, "I don't think I'd have a problem with that."

Kenny nodded and set Butters down in front of the tombstone and sat next to him, "Good, I didn't think so."

Butters sighed wistfully and leaned his head on Kenny's shoulder, grateful for the comfort the closeness provided. So much of South Park life was nonsensical and fucking temporary, but this, this was something he hoped never to do without. Only Kenny could quell the sea of emotions that was Butters.

Kenny smiled down at Butters peaceful figure and wrapped an arm around his lithe body.

"You know, these tombstones are a fucking bitch to wake up under. There's no space, it's always so fucking cramped." He mused absently.

Butters cracked a smile, only Kenny, honestly.

"Well Kenny, if you're so upset about it I'll buy you your own mausoleum someday."

"Really?" Kenny brightened with mock childishness, "A big fucking mansion with cable and a minifridge?"

"Don't forget the king-sized bed made out of real panda fur."

"Of course! And the hot tub, right Butterfly?"

Butters laughed melodically, "Right, Kenny."

Hearing the change in Butters' voice, Kenny tilted his chin up so as to get a good look at those baby blues. Butters met the intense stare easily.

"I love you _so _much, Butters. Never forget that." Kenny said after a moment, eyes never once leaving Butters'.

"I know, Kenny. I love you too, more than you could ever understand."

Kenny smiled softly, "Oh I think I have some idea." And with that he pulled Butters into a loving kiss that didn't end until the sun hung low in the sky and both boys sat together, drinking the other in.

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I don't own SP. There. I said it. *owie*

For those of you who might not know what a mausoleum is, it's like a stone house to bury multiple dead in. They are very expensive and usually wealthy families have them (I would think so anyway) it's kind of like a crypt except I think crypts go underground. I always think of mausoleums as like the ultimate burial pad, and so befitting of Kenny.

Don't forget to R&R! Also feel free to leave a comment or PM me with any new ideas for this or other SP pairings.

~Vindi


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